A new favourite song...

Back when the teams were here, someone gave me a Building 429 CD and I never really listened to it. I just randomly heard this song tonight... at seemingly the perfect time. This is a great song... I wish I could make it so you could hear the song and not just the lyrics, because the song itself is just really awesome. Anyway, here are the lyrics...

No One Else Knows
My world is closing in
On the inside
But I’m not showing it
When all I am is crying out
I hold it in and fake a smile
Still I’m broken
I’m broken
Only one can understand
And only one can hold the hand
Of the broken
Of the broken

When no one else knows how I feel
Your love for me is proven real
When no one else cares where I’ve been
You run to me with outstretched hands
And You hold me in your arms
Again

I need no explanation of "why me?"
I just need confirmation
Only You could understand
the emptiness inside my head
I am falling
I am falling
I’m falling down upon my knees
To find the one who gives me peace
I am flying
Lord I am flying

When no one else knows how I feel
Your love for me is proven real
When no one else cares where I’ve been
You run to me with outstretched hands
And You hold me in Your arms
Again

I have come to you in search of faith
Cause I can’t see beyond this place
Oh You are God and I am man
So I’ll leave it in Your hands

Now, I'm sure you're thinking that I am really depressed or something, but I'm really not! (Mom, don't worry, your little girl is fine;)) But I was feeling a little wierd tonight... partly probably because I'm overly tired from not much sleep last night, partly because a friend of mine let me down. Also, lots of people asked me when I'm going home tonight at Bible study and I had to repeatedly tell them when and then explain to them why I'm not excited about leaving... they all seem to think I should be excited... I think they forget that it is not an adventure for me as it would be for them!! :)

Anyway, about the song... how right it is. And not just in my case. I wonder how many people (South Africans and Americans alike... and anyone else for that matter) go through their days feeling like no one understands them? That makes me sad for people. I wish I could help them and understand them, but it seems like we all have such mucked up lives that we can all only focus on our own issues. Why can't I stop whining about having to leave SA and start caring for other people as much as I care about myself? I think the sin of selfishness is a strong one, and a sneaky one that slips in without being noticed for a long time. I pray that God will make me more aware of times whem I am focused so much on myself that I cannot see the obvious needs and hurts of others. Lord, make me aware of where you can use me to care for your sheep. Help me to understand them and show them Your love. Amen

Now, that was my 'deep thought' for the night. On to another quick note... tonight at Bible study we divided into new small groups. Last time I was in an all girls group and I really liked it, but something happened and somehow I was not in that group anymore. So... meet my friends! (Some of whom are kinda new to me, some whom I've known for a while!)
From left to right we have... Stacy, Moses, Charisse, Chris, Eric and me. :) I think we actually ended up with the most 'diverse' group - so hooay for diversity! I think it'll be a fun group... most of these people are pretty silly, but can calm down and be serious when needed, which should be a recipe for a great small group. Let the good times roll! (See Mom? I'm not depressed;) haha)

Thanks for checking in on me!! Goodnight!
in Him,

Bonnie B.

Link to pictures:
http://community.webshots.com/user/bonnieb81